Healing From Neglect Using EFT with Veronica Kelly

Have you ever felt the transformative power of self-love ripple through your being? We have Veronica Kelly on the show today, an expert in guiding souls to empowerment is an odyssey through the practices that awaken this profound personal shift. We unpack the magic of Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), sound therapy, yoga, and more as keys to unlock a deeper communion with our inner spirit.

Who is Veronica Kelly?
Veronica Kelly is a coach specializing in self-discovery and empowerment.  She uses a unique blend of yoga, self-love, EFT, and compassion to unlock people's potential. Veronica is a licensed practitioner with nearly a decade of experience witnessing the positive transformations these methods bring.

Timestamps to help you navigate this episode:
0:00 Intro
2:46 FREE Self Love & Sweat MONTHLY Calendar
7:22 Recognizing the Need for Recharging
15:52 Healing Through EFT and Self-Compassion
20:52 EFT Tapping For Emotional Freedom
31:08 Breaking Free From Limiting Beliefs and Fears
36:27 Sponsor: Snap Supplements 25% OFF using code LUNDEN25

Connect with Veronica:
https://linktr.ee/VeronicaAjaKelly
@veronicaajakelly

Transcript

Lunden Souza: 2:26

Welcome to Self Love and Sweat The Podcast, the place where you'll get inspired to live your life unapologetically, embrace your perfect imperfections, break down barriers and do what sets your soul on fire. I'm your host, Lunden Souza. Hey, have you grabbed your free Self Love and Sweat monthly calendar yet? This calendar is so amazing. It comes right in your inbox every single month to help you have a little nugget of wisdom, a sweaty workout, a mindset activity, just a little something, something to help keep you focused and motivated and keep that momentum towards your goals. So every day, when you get this calendar, you'll see a link that you can click that will lead to a podcast episode or a workout or something that will be very powerful and quick to read. And then you'll also see, on the top left corner of every single day, there's a little checkbox in the calendar and what that is is that's for your one thing. You can choose one thing every month, or it can be the same, something that you want to implement and make this something that you can easily implement, like daily meditation or getting a certain amount of steps or water, for example, and staying hydrated and even taking your supplements. This can be something if you want to get more regular doing a particular habit and routine. You can choose what that checkbox means. So if you want your Self Love and Sweat free monthly calendar delivered right to your inbox every month on the first of the month, go to lifelikelunden. com/c alendar. Fill out the form really quickly and you will have your calendar in your inbox within a few short minutes. That's lifelikelunden L-I-F-E-L-I-K-E-L-U-N-D-E-N dot com forward slash calendar. Go get yours for free and enjoy this episode.

Lunden Souza: 4:31

Welcome back to Self Love and Sweat The Podcast and Self Love and Sweat Radio.

Lunden Souza: 4:39

Wherever you're listening today, we have Veronica Kelly as our guest. Veronica is a transformative force guiding individuals on a journey of self-discovery and empowerment through the potent blend of yoga, self-love, compassion and EFT, which stands for Emotional Freedom Techniques. With nearly a decade of experience as a licensed practitioner, Veronica has dedicated herself to these healing modalities, witnessing firsthand the profound shifts they catalyze in people's lives. As a seasoned transformational coach, Veronica helps you connect with your body and operate in the quantum field. Through her unique therapeutic system, she empowers individuals to cultivate lasting self-love, releasing what no longer serves them and stepping into the fullness of their spiritual potential. In person, Veronica enhances her sessions with the transformative power of sound therapy, focusing on clearing and harmonizing the chakra system and energetic body for holistic integration and healing. Veronica serves as an ambassador for love and compassion, firmly believing in the limitless possibilities that unfold when individuals connect with their inner spirit, receive unwavering support and cultivate authentic self-love and trust. With Veronica's guidance, anything becomes possible. I'm so excited to have you here, Veronica. Welcome to the show.

Veronica Kelly: 6:01

Thanks for having me. It's so fun to hear my bio out loud.

Lunden Souza: 6:06

Right, I love it. I love reading the bios. I love starting the episode that way because, yeah, it's a very good jumping off point and I know there's so much more meat on the bones to who you are outside of the bio. But Veronica and I met. We haven't met in person yet. We will, which I'm super excited about. But we met through the NABA community, which I talk about a lot here on the podcast and you'll be hearing a lot more about. But in this community, Veronica reached out to me one day and she's like hey, I want to get to know you more, let's hop on a call, let's just be one-on-one. And we had so much overlap in terms of what we're interested in, what we feel like our sole purpose is what sets our soul on fire, and so I'm excited to dive even deeper with you today.

Veronica Kelly: 6:59

I'm so excited as well. I feel like we might have met at the event in Denver.

Lunden Souza: 7:07

Oh, did we, Okay Maybe.

Veronica Kelly: 7:08

I think it was like a brief hi, how are you? Lunden, Veronica, Veronica, Lunden, hi, so.

Lunden Souza: 7:13

Okay, cool. So then I'm excited for when it's there you are, I'm so excited to hold you and squeeze you in person. I love that. Um, I want to kind of start it off with what you posted on social media I think it was yesterday or the day before about playing hooky. You posted a really beautiful reel about you and nature just taking time for you, for self-love, for whatever reason that it was that you decided. I can think from my perspective being an entrepreneur, work and living and sometimes we forget that like, hey, we need those moments of turning off and going in and playing hooky without shame, without guilt, without feeling like we're messing up or we're doing something wrong. How was your day of hooky? What did you do? What inspired it?

Veronica Kelly: 8:10

Yes, totally 100% what you just said. It is so important. I personally don't find enough time for myself to just completely unplug, like leave my cell phone in the car, go completely away from nature, so I'm not available to anybody. That is something I cherish and I love. I work so closely with spirit and with nature and I get that's how I fuel myself, like that's where I get my batteries recharged in a major way.

Veronica Kelly: 8:36

And I yesterday it was just so funny I had such long couple of weeks which are been so busy and so lovely, and I'm gearing up. I do sound bath, healing circles, new moon circles, full moon circles, self-love, connecting with Christ consciousness every single Friday night. So I have a lot goes into preparing for that and that kind of starts, you know, Monday and I'm starting to put together what I'm going to do for that. And so there's always about 50,000 tasks, as you know as an entrepreneur, that could get done. 50,000 tasks, as you know as an entrepreneur, that could get done. And when that moment comes, when I'm like I don't want to show up and do this job that I love and present this topic, that lights up my soul and it starts to feel like a work, that's when I know not work, it starts to feel like a chore.

Veronica Kelly: 9:26

That's when, I know I need to recharge, step away, fill myself up, get myself inspired, and then I can come back. And that energy of feeling inspired is what translates and helps people to have the experience themselves.

Lunden Souza: 9:40

Yeah, how do you know when it feels like a chore? Do you hear something? Do you feel something? How do you recognize when it's time to do that?

Veronica Kelly: 9:49

Well, personally, I know that this podcast will not just be, it's not just for right now. But astrology right now what's happening in the air? There's a lot going on with old moons coming back around and we have a full moon this week and I personally have just had a couple big layers come up in my own healing journey. That got to be witnessed that I'm so blessed that I can use my tools that I use in my practice on myself, and so I've just had the last few days have been. I've had a lot of stuff come up and so for me I did just fell off kilter and by doing the practices, going for the walk I live right by a beautiful lake here in Austin, so I can go for that walk and that's helpful, that my typical walk wasn't turning me on in the way and like really rejuvenating my soul, so I was like where can I go?

Veronica Kelly: 10:40

that has no wifi, that's nowhere near anything. And so I went and sat by a waterfall and just like hiked in and had left my phone in the car and was like I just need to fully recharge. And so I'm a total in I want to say intuitive, introspective and clear audio person. So I hear, I feel I go a lot off of what my gut tells me, my body tells me, and so when I need to check out and not look at a computer anymore, I'll get like some strange pain or some weird feeling in my body and I'm like, oh, this is not natural. And when I tune into myself I know, okay, I need to reset, I need to get outside, I need water, I need nature.

Lunden Souza: 11:24

Yeah, and I love that. You said you can kind of feel it in your body and I know that people listening can't see you move, but maybe they're watching the videos and you can and you're kind of like wiggling and you can kind of see that squirm and you know, I think oftentimes we can feel something, maybe like for me it's right behind my heart, space, and, my back. That's kind of where things will get like turn into like a little bit more of a knot. I'll feel some tension there and it's very, I think, maybe easy. Or people can easily be like oh, my back hurts, so I need to get a massage to like rub into that specific area. But what I've realized is it's not always like muscle tissue that needs to be rubbed out because it's hurting. It's actually an emotional signal of like hey, I've been doing too much.

Lunden Souza: 12:15

The things like you mentioned, the things that you normally love, start to become a chore and you're like wait, but I love teaching my classes, I love helping others on their healing journey. Or, in my case, I love talking on the podcast or whatever. But even last week, when we were going to record, I had to play hooky as well, but for me it wasn't out in nature. It was just in my bed all day where I was like you know what? No, I'm not going to push my limits to go after something that doesn't need to be done.

Lunden Souza: 12:45

Right in this moment I'm going to change it because I started to feel that physical sensation within my body of like no, I know that doesn't mean that I need a massage. It means that massages are great, I love them, but it actually is more of an emotional signal to me to dial things back a little bit, and that took me a while of not listening to that feeling and pushing through it anyway, to realize that is not a path that I want to be on. That's not a signal that I want to ignore. Can you think of a moment where you maybe ignored it? Or how did you learn to listen to that whisper? That's like you learn to listen to that whisper that's like time to play hooky, sister.

Veronica Kelly: 13:38

Well, for me, I love that we've migrated in this direction because that is actually the basis of my entire practice. This is Brass Tacks and I'll break it down for listeners, for you. That basically how it works inside of our body when it comes to healing and emotion and trauma big T trauma, little t trauma whatever our bodies cannot handle in the moment, whatever our nervous system cannot process in real time, it literally gets stored away in our energetic field, in our body, so that at a later date we can come when we have more availability, more resources, more maturity to hold the space and witness what needs to come up to the surface. And there's a beautiful book called the Body Keeps the Score, which I absolutely love.

Lunden Souza: 14:20

I love that book absolutely me too and it's a book I did, the audio book, which is like, I think, over 40 hours of audio, but I love it.

Veronica Kelly: 14:29

Yeah, and which is, like, I think, over 40 hours of audio, but I love it, yeah, and that's, and that's what I do with EFT, with yoga and with breath which I know you're such a huge fan of breath and with my other healing modality of the compassion. Key is really leaning into those feelings that are uncomfortable or painful or weird or just out of congruence with our normal everyday routine of walking, living, eating and breathing and being in the world. And then learning to lean into that and asking those questions hey, how do you feel? Breathing in and being like, oh, as I touch base into, like for you, like with your shoulder, leaning into your shoulder, and I have a similar space, that's where I hold a lot of stuff, leaning in and just like hand on the heart, hand on the belly, and be like what's trying to express itself right now what do I need to listen to, what do I need?

Veronica Kelly: 15:15

And really going into that space and when we go into it, give it a little compassion, give it a little acceptance and a little love. It will unravel and show you whatever has been hiding for a really long time. We just need to have the courage to go within instead of ignoring, pushing away using X, Y, or Z to numb and just give it that space. I'm here and I'm listening because our body doesn't want to hold on to that stuff. It wants to be free and healed and have fun. So for me, I learned now how to go within through emotional freedom technique, through compassion key, through breath and through yoga.

Lunden Souza: 15:53

Yeah, and I love how you said what is it trying to reveal to me, or what is it sharing, versus how can I make it go away the fastest. I think that's what's gotten us into a lot of dis-ease, as a society is being like, how can I make it go away the fastest, versus what's it trying to tell me? What can I learn from it? What is trying to be expressed here? Tell us a little bit more about EFT, Emotional Freedom Techniques and the compassion key. I know a little bit and I'm sure there's some listeners who have maybe heard of it or maybe it's completely new to them, so open up that for us.

Veronica Kelly: 16:38

I'd love to. I'm obsessed with it so I'm always happy to talk about it. So to talk a little bit about Emotional Freedom Technique and EFT and how it, what it, how, how it came into my life. Um, to be just super transparent, my entire life changed by the addition of emotional freedom technique to my healing journey. So just a little bit about me and my story.

Veronica Kelly: 17:02

When I was my first, like five, six years of my life is when I had extreme neglect, extreme abandonment, extreme I want to say unintentional abuse. My parents were just really, really, really young when they had me and they just were not fit and did not have the skill sets to raise a toddler. And, as I had said, you know, whatever we can't process in the moment gets stored in our body for a later date. And so during those first few years when my brain was in theta brainwave state, I took on all of the things and the trauma as being my fault. And, long story short, my grandparents adopted me and that provided me a stable home. And the thing of it is is you cannot explain to a four-year-old why her mom and dad don't want her anymore. And so I picked up this limiting belief that I was lovable X, Y, and Z but the thing about those subconscious programs, we don't know that. I didn't know I had that. So I'm walking around in the world with these different points of view about myself and I was in Los Angeles and I was.

Veronica Kelly: 18:07

I put together a show and it was really loosely based on my life and my dating and we put it together and I was at the premiere and I saw just like 45 minutes of it, like date after date, after date after date, and it was hilarious. The show was amazing. But I the next day was like, oh my God, maybe this is me, like I really gave me this like outside perspective to say no, there's not just jerks, it's the same jerk over and over again. And so that's when I dove into my in my healing journey and through my therapy and my talk therapy, I realized that I had a belief that I wasn't lovable, that it wasn't valuable, and then I wasn't important. And so once I realized that, I was like of course I'm letting these people treat me this way, of course I have a substance abuse problem, of course I'm not living up to my full potential, because this is my beliefs about myself. So I went in and did all the regular therapies and I. It's one of the things I love about EFT and the compassion key versus regular therapy. Regular therapy is great and it gives you so much perspective. I learned so many things that I would never have thought to, I just never thought existed in my, in my relationships.

Veronica Kelly: 19:16

Growing up from a trained therapist, I do not discount trained therapy and talk therapy at all, and I think it needs to go a little bit deeper because when we get out of our head and get into our heart, that is when we actually make changes in our life. So once I started to do EFT, within months my whole life changed. I attracted an amazing partner. I had a total 180 of what I wanted to do with my life's purpose. I had money finally start to come in that I could keep instead of pushing away, and I really found that I was a completely different person. At least I was building the blocks of becoming a completely different person.

Veronica Kelly: 19:52

And the EFT is what got it tangible in my life and said the theoretical in my head that this is something I want to achieve. So that's kind of the backstory of what made me head completely down the path of not only wanting to master it but wanting to teach other people about it is because I saw that massive change in my life, and so the basics of what EFT does is when you have the trauma the big T trauma or little T trauma, whether it's big T neglect, abandonment, abuse, or small T, such as you got pantsed in front of the class when you were giving a presentation, or some boy you really liked didn't like you back and embarrassed you those small things are still real to our nervous system and so whatever does not get processed in the moment gets stored in the body. So, eft, we hit different lines of energy and these lines of energy open up highways and just let the thing that's stuck.

Lunden Souza: 20:52

When you say hit different lines of energy for those listening, Veronica, you are touching yourself. When you say hit different lines of energy and EFT, are you actually physically touching the person?

Veronica Kelly: 21:05

Yes, so what we do, our body has meridian points. This is what the needles are put into when you go and you get acupuncture Cool.

Veronica Kelly: 21:15

Yep you get acupuncture and they press on to the certain spot. That's the lines of energy. This is our meridian system. So with EFT we have those lines and we tap them on ourselves. So one is in between the eye and the nose, another one is outside the eye, at the cheekbone, at the nose. These are different lines of energy that correspond with different parts of the body, like different glands, different organs, and when you just lightly tap on yourself so this is all us doing it to ourselves, guided with a practitioner, when we tap on these lines of energy, we just open up the space and then we just communicate to our body and say, hey, I love and accept you, cause the first step in EFT is loving and accepting what is so, whatever the thing is.

Veronica Kelly: 22:03

So if you're in a really having a really crappy day or you don't say I don't want to go, so for you say I don't want to show up and go do this interview, I just want to lay in bed, and you would tap on these spots, communicating with your body hey, I see that you don't want to go, get up and do anything and I love and accept you. I know procrastination can be scary and you feel like you have to do it, but I love and accept you anyways. I give you permission body to stay in bed and not do anything because that's what's right for you. I love it and so you. You're always just accepting and giving permission for whatever the heck is in your space, no matter how bad or good quote, air quotes, bad or good to just present and you give it permission and you give your body permission to pull that part of you to the surface so it can be witnessed.

Lunden Souza: 22:51

Yes, and I remember last week when we had this conversation. I just remember I wasn't specifically doing what you mentioned, but the dialogue that you just said is very different than most dialogues. When people don't do something that they think they're supposed to do or that they think is air quotes good or bad, it's usually like I'm lazy. All this negative dialogue can come up. But I just remember putting my hands over my heart, laying in bed and being like I'm so grateful that I'm my own boss, that I own my time, that I had this vision Before people were working online. I was like, no, I'm going to be able to own my time, be my own boss.

Lunden Souza: 23:34

And I just was like I'm grateful that I could take the day off when I needed it, when my body communicated it needs some more rest. I'm happy I didn't have to ask someone can I have the day off? I'm happy that I didn't have to push through anyway and just yeah, giving that compassion and love. Because it's easy to go down the rabbit hole of like, oh my gosh, I'm procrastinating, I'm not getting stuff done, I'm lazy, I'm not hardworking, and when I think about my programming growing up and our work really being our worth, and the more you work and the more hours and the more doing, the better. That was really like a highway that I was on autopilot. That now, when I have those moments of being like no, I need a break and doing it with compassion is so powerful and I know it changes our nervous system response and the hormones that are running through our bodies.

Veronica Kelly: 24:33

Yes and two things to that is I love that you said how important it is for you to have that conversation with yourself, because one thing I teach in my classes, I teach with my clients I remind myself daily of is the most important words you'll ever hear are the ones that you tell yourself.

Veronica Kelly: 24:53

So, whatever it is you're choosing to have in that inner dialogue that creates our reality, and so, from that space that's one of the things with EFT is we're learning to have that kind conversation with ourselves and saying I love and accept you, even though X, y and Z is happening, and using the power of our word to affect our relationship with ourselves which, like you just said, affects our nervous system.

Veronica Kelly: 25:19

One of the first things that EFT does is it gives your body permission to come out of that cortisol-filled stress zone and puts you in rest and restore, and just the accepting of what is, with love and compassion, allows for your body to make that flip. And, as we all know, when we're in overdrive or when we're in stress, when we have cortisol pumping through our brain, pumping through our body, that we do not have the energy or the neuropeptides or the availability to do the healing and the loving and the compassion and the joy. We prioritize our energy to stress, stress, stress, stress, and so that's one of the best things about EFT is, if someone has anxiety or high levels of stress, or you name it, they can bring it down just through a couple rounds of EFT, which is that's why, like, my brand is heal yourself with Veronica Kelly, because these tools, you learn it and then you can apply it to yourself anytime, anywhere, and that's why I think it's so powerful.

Lunden Souza: 26:24

Yeah, and you set your clients up to where they can learn modalities from you, but they don't need you to do something to fix them. I think people can think that, like, I need to go to the doctor or go somewhere to get something to fix me instead of being able to access some of that inner wisdom and some of those tools that you can help open the door to. But then we have to go in and actually utilize them and we have to go in and actually heal ourselves, right?

Veronica Kelly: 27:01

I love that and that's what I appreciate about what people like yourself are doing with these podcasts and I've listened to multiples of your shows and I love the change makers that you have on, because it is a theme about we just need, we just get to learn how to utilize them in a way that serves us, because we're more magic and we're more powerful, we're more loving, we have got more spirit and abilities than we've ever been led to believe, and so now is the time that we get to learn those skills and teach our friends and family and clients those skills as well.

Lunden Souza: 27:47

I love that. I love it. Let's talk about spirit. Yeah, I know that. Yeah, maybe people listening have heard the term spirit before. I think you mentioned in the beginning that's how I connect with spirit and what does that mean and why is connecting with spirit so important to like accessing your truest potential.

Veronica Kelly: 28:09

You know, I love that you asked that question and it's interesting because I could talk about this subject for like 10 hours and never get tired of it, because I feel it's so special and magical and we have such available. The universe is on our side always and you know, being a yogi, being a yoga teacher, being a yogini like I practice what I teach as well it is all about fostering that connection with the power and the presence that is inside of everyone. We literally have more potential, more power, more energy, more love, more light inside of us. We don't need to go to all the outside places to get it. We are the lighthouses, and the more that we can clear away the cobwebs and the shadows and let our light shine through, the more that we get to live a full potentiality life of awesomeness, because that's what we're supposed to live. And so it's crazy too, when you think about which I I love this with my clients, getting them into this conversation If we think that we're out here all by ourselves.

Lunden Souza: 29:22

We don't have any universal support, no synchronicities, no universal guidance, and we have to do everything on our own that is depressing and exhausting.

Veronica Kelly: 29:27

No, thank you, don't sign me up for that. And when we open up to the possibility that something greater than me wants to move through I just have to get out of my own way, that I'm worthy, that I have the ability to just shine my light, and that is enough Then the world opens up in a way that you can't even imagine. I love the theory that we are always, that we came here to earth to forget, and that's what our ego mind gets to do. It's separation. It's the worst case scenario. It puts us in like a game of forgetting our true nature. And then we get to walk a path where we get to remember our true nature, overcoming one obstacle at a time, one obstacle at a time, until we can fully embody our light and then be the lighthouse for other people to show.

Veronica Kelly: 30:08

And it really speaks to the difference between ego and faith fear and faith, because faith is operating from spirit. Fear is operating from the can'ts, the coulda, the woulda, the shouldas, the ego mind trying to keep us safe. And what I love is that, at any time, faith and fear are asking the same thing of us to put our attention into something that has yet to happen. So when we put our attention in a worst case scenario that hasn't happened yet, the fear then that leads us down that path. When we put our attention in the best case scenario, faith that leads us down that path. When we put our attention in the best case scenario, faith that leads us down that path. And so, at any given time, we have that choice. We want to step into the faith ego mind I have to do it all by myself, or step into wow, what if things turned out better than I ever imagined? What if?

Veronica Kelly: 31:00

the whole world was looking out on my side and that just feels so much better and it gets us off the hook.

Lunden Souza: 31:08

Yes, yes, I think of what Dr Joe Dispenza says is like where you place your attention is where you place your energy and I've never heard it explained the way you just said it and I love it where it's like both want to put energy in something that's yet unseen, whether it's the worst case scenario, the downward spiral, let's say, or the upward spiral of like, what if it could be even better than I imagined? What if my mind can only comprehend something cool, but it could be even greater, even bigger, even more awesome. Do you think that it's important to live in or to dance between both? Do you think that even in the pursuit of best case scenario, it's wise to maybe look at some of the worst case scenario? How do you operate? What do you think is best for us?

Veronica Kelly: 32:05

I'm big on intuition and you know I love Abraham Hicks work, I love Dr, and I love Dr Bernard Beckwith at Agape's work. Um, the three of those, those three uh works, have really influenced and changed my perspective on the world. So we need to be optimists, we need to be cautiously optimistic in some situations. You know, I don't think it's a great idea to just laugh at fear and, you know, walk down a dark alley by yourself as a woman in high heels, alone at midnight If your intuition says don't do it. If you have that fear, sometimes fear is there to keep us safe and to say, you know, hey, this probably is not the best choice, but living in that space where it is coming so often and you're having the repeat, the repetitive fear, the repetitive fear, the repetitive fears, giving yourself permission to say I see, you fear, thank you for trying to keep me safe. Today I'll turn my attention back to faith and just get curious and see, and just get curious and see, but having the ability to discern between a fear that's trying to keep me safe versus a fear that's trying to keep me stuck, because we can only grow to a place in which we feel safe to do so and the ego doesn't want to die. We don't like. Humans will stay, and I've been guilty of this in my life for sure. We will stay uncomfortable because it's so scary to break through for a better life. That's right over here. So oftentimes we'll stay in that uncomfortable feeling tone. Then we will take have the courage to break through that fear and get to the better, the better end side of life, and that's why we're quote creatures of habit, if you will.

Veronica Kelly: 33:59

So being in that space of cultivating safety is the most important and that's the first step I do with all of my clients when we go through the eight week, your eight week course with me, because I work an eight week course, eight weeks at a time with my clients. The first two weeks are about creating safety. So whether they want to create a new job opportunity, a better relationship with themselves, a better partner, whatever it is that they're looking to achieve in their life, I spend the first two weeks at least making sure their nervous system feels safe to make a change, and EFT will do that If you're tapping on the EFT points. Even though change can be scary, I am safe to do so.

Veronica Kelly: 34:38

Even though feeling the feelings can be scary. I am safe to feel these feelings. I trust myself. I am safe to trust myself. And once we feel safe to step outside of our comfort zone and lean more into the faith, then beautiful things open up. So there's that discernment. Is this fear trying to keep me from dying for real, or is this trying to keep me in this small box because that's all I'd ever known and it's too scary to get out?

Lunden Souza: 35:03

small box because that's all I'd ever known and it's too scary to get out. I love that. Is the fear trying to keep me safe, like the woman, dark alley, late at night, unsafe area or is it trying to keep me stuck which kind of reminds me of what you said about the movie that you had a chance to actually watch, about your dating stories to be like, wait, I'm stuck in this loop, I can see it over and over and over again. That's kind of like that common denominator moment. I love that. Is this fear trying to keep me safe or keep me stuck? And I think that's a very, quite like. I think when we ask ourselves that question, we get an opportunity to be super honest with ourselves and look in the mirror and kind of look at our shit a little bit of like oh wait, I never thought of it like that before. Am I in that same loop over and over again? Or is this important for my actual safety? And you also said two people will stay in that same loop because the discomfort is familiar and until we're in that space of safety, to feel like, okay, I can make a change. I'm not afraid of losing that safety and security because I'm deciding to go left instead of going right. If someone's felt very unsafe for a long time like you mentioned, spending two solid weeks how does a person know that they now feel safe to make a change? Hey, really quick.

Lunden Souza: 36:29

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Lunden Souza: 37:29

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Veronica Kelly: 38:26

You know it's about just taking those steps and taking those actions and see how they feel on your nervous system. Because you know bottom line is all of our defense mechanisms have been put into place at one point to keep us safe. So say, for example, you've had your heart completely smashed open wide and now you have a heart and a barrier and you'll never let anybody get close enough to ever hurt you, but you're also being kept in isolation. So you need to make your body and your nervous system understand I'm safe to let somebody in. I'm safe to let somebody in. I'm open to feeling these feelings and allowing myself to make a new choice. And it's just that reinforcement process and a lot of it has to do with feeling the feelings. You know, giving yourself the permission to feel the feelings that you've been avoiding Because when we feel the feelings, that we make friends with the feelings.

Veronica Kelly: 39:15

They don't have power over us anymore, and so there is no, it's going to take seven days of doing EFT, three days a week or three times a day. I mean it's not like it's going to take a month. There's. It's different for each person in the degree of what they need in order to feel their feelings and allow their nervous systems to come in a place of safety and curiosity. And that's where that faith situation happens. It can start with.

Veronica Kelly: 39:41

You know, sometimes I'll I'll give my clients um little activities, such as I want you to smile at three people today, look them in the eyes and smile and journal about how that felt I smile. I was. That's one of the things I was pissed about at COVID. I was like I'm smiling in my mask all day long and like are they smiling back? Are they not smiling back? I just want to see a smile because I'm a smiler, you know. But if you don't feel safe connecting with other people and you don't feel vulnerable, three smiles a day can be a lot. Looking somebody in the eye and smiling at a complete stranger.

Veronica Kelly: 40:16

So those little tasks and steps that get you out of your comfort zone, getting comfortable with those and then getting comfortable with the next one and building that faith in yourself and trust in yourself and reinforcing those habits so that you create the new neurological pathways. That is how it goes and there is no rhyme or reason, but it takes baby steps, reinforcement, acceptance and compassion and just whatever that stretch looks like for you.

Lunden Souza: 40:45

Is the stretch Like for you or I? It might not be a stretch for us to smile at everybody that we see, whereas for somebody it might be expansive and a stretch and out of their comfort zone to do that. So finding what is going to be that next stretch for you. So that way, when it comes time to do the change work or some of the more challenging things, you can already look at the history of yourself and have built up those pathways of like okay, I didn't want to do that and I did it. That seemed uncomfortable but I did it anyway. I thought that was scary, but when I did it it wasn't as scary as I thought scary, but when I did it it wasn't as scary as I thought.

Lunden Souza: 41:25

With my clients, we work a lot on having the tough conversations and conscious communication and speaking your truth, and sometimes what dances in their brain before having the conversation is this big mountain and I hear all the time like, oh, when I just did it, when I just showed up for the conversation and had it, it was like the monster under the bed. That was actually just like a little fuzz that illuminated with the light on the wall to make it like this bigger, scarier monster than it actually was. And when we get that evidence of pushing our limits, doing something uncomfortable, and then it's like I didn't die, like nothing bad happened because I decided to go out and smile or I decided to go out and have the tough conversation, those are like the bicep curls for your nervous system to strengthen and go back in to do some of the stuff that really fucking matters. Yeah.

Veronica Kelly: 42:18

I'm smiling so big because I totally get it. And that's why it's very important, for no matter where people are in their healing journey or even their transformative journey whether it is just getting a digital course or working one-on-one with a course or go picking up a coach or go picking up a book is to find somebody or something that can support you in these habits and help you to know what you can go do to get outside of your comfort zone. Cause, like once I remember for me it was so silly I was one of my first coaches I hired and it was a long time ago. It was a long time ago and I was worrying about finances that was my thing at the time and we had this, um, we had this exercise where they're like, okay, you have to, what is one thing you've been avoiding? And I had one bedroom and I had a desk and it had just a mound of crap, Like just you know, bill after thing after thing, like just completely, just so much, and I had just avoided it and it was gotten to my bedroom so it was like the last thing I'm looking at, the first thing.

Veronica Kelly: 43:25

And so my coach was like, okay, buy, meeting next week. I want that whole thing. Take a picture of me now. Take a picture of it afterwards. I want to see it. And you're gonna open up every single envelope on your desk. I Opened up my envelope. Total owed was 125 dollars. Everything had already been paid, everything was was already old. Everything was like just a letter from somebody like Google, fiber or whatever. And it was all in my head for months where I had been making up oh my God, I'm going to owe hundreds of thousands of dollars. I mean, it just was this whole thing. And then once I did it from my coach telling me to do it I was like, huh, this is all in my head. So I totally exactly what you said. It's so true, whether it is anything in this world, we can make up a story about it to keep us stuck. And once we face that fear, then it gives us more strength in the faith department so that we can lean more into faith.

Lunden Souza: 44:18

That's like you say bicep curls for your nervous system.

Veronica Kelly: 44:20

It's also bicep curls for your faith system.

Lunden Souza: 44:25

Yes and I love that you brought that up, because I know every single person listening right now there's something that you're avoiding, whether it's the pile of bills that you think is a bigger mountain than it potentially is, whether it's the pile of laundry that needs to get done, whether it's the pot, whatever that might be, and I think I'm just going to go out. I don't ever really give like homework on the podcast, but whoever's listening, go out and tackle that thing you've been avoiding. I think for me sometimes that what I'm avoiding is like and I'm looking at it right now, so I'm talking to myself too is I got back from my it wasn't vacation, but I was hosting a seminar, visiting my family and my suitcase is still in the middle of my floor with a few things that hasn't been unpacked yet. Right, I've been looking at it, it's right here, I could see it here and what I found with those things and even though it's like I know when I it's going to take me probably three to five minutes to type what.

Lunden Souza: 45:29

What's in here is hardly nothing right. I've been fishing things out of the suitcase to not doing the thing right, and what often I realize is is what I make the mountain in my head is it's going to take so long. I don't have time. There's other things that need to get done, but really, most of probably, what people are listening to now and what they're avoiding is probably like an hour tops right, whatever that might be, and so for those listening, go out. I'm going to do it to myself, like, do the thing you've been avoiding and then journal about what happened. Think about what happened. Dm myself or Veronica on Instagram and tell us about how you'd been avoiding something and you actually went after it instead and how it wasn't as scary as you thought. And I think you know those are our friends.

Veronica Kelly: 46:21

Yeah, please put on a celebration song and celebrate the fuck out of yourself because you did it.

Lunden Souza: 46:26

Because you did it, I know, isn't it crazy? Yeah, you totally called me in on that, where I was like oh, I know what I've been avoiding and it's right in front of my eyeballs and it's right in front of my stairs that I walk up when I go, because I'm on my apartments on a top level, nothing's underneath me, but you go up and it's literally right by my stairs. So, of course, every time I leave and come back, I see it, I notice it, I acknowledge it. It's still sitting there.

Veronica Kelly: 46:51

Subconscious mind I don't have enough time. I don't have enough time. It's telling your subconscious mind over and over again, Every time you walk by we don't have enough time.

Lunden Souza: 47:03

Better hurry, better hurry. I'm human, I avoid shit. What's?

Veronica Kelly: 47:05

up. I know that's right, I know that's right all day girl.

Lunden Souza: 47:08

But that's why I love conversations like this on the podcast. That's why I love relationships with people like you. That's why I love the dialogue surrounding the healing journey, and what we're working through is because just because you and I have platforms or coaches or whatever doesn't mean that all of our ducks are in all of the rows all of the time. It just means that we're open to leaning more into that faith, spirit-led discomfort for the sake of figuring out what's on the other side of that change. What's on the other side of doing the thing that you think you don't want to do, what's on the other side of the flip side of the story. You've been telling yourself a bunch, and so I'm very inspired and excited about this conversation. Tell us more about your eight-week coaching and how people can get connected with you, if that's what they're feeling called to.

Veronica Kelly: 48:07

Absolutely so. I have multiple offerings my Austin Texas homies I do events every week and one of my newest offerings, which I'm really excited to take this on the road and get in front of more people, it's connecting with the Christ consciousness and, just through meditation, breath and sound, getting to know that energy of compassion and love within you and just giving people permission to go within and just fostering that connection to our magic, because we've been conditioned for so long to give our power away, to have to go outside of ourselves, but everything is right within us and it's just one breath away from connecting to. So I love. I love my in-person offerings. And then, um, I work internationally with people online as well as in person.

Veronica Kelly: 48:53

If you're in Austin, my eight week coaching program is level up your life in eight weeks and we just allow for whatever the specific goal is for you that you're creating in your space, to clear all the things that are blocking you through love and compassion, and it's I work in the quantum, so I work with energy.

Veronica Kelly: 49:12

We work with wounds. It's a very, very unique process of realigning yourself to the magic and presence and every time and something worth mentioning every time that we do witness and clear a wound, the energy that's been stuck there and this goes to like when we are avoiding doing something the energy that's stuck in that avoidance, the energy that's stuck in the trauma we can't face, the energy that's stuck in the limiting belief. Once we make friends with it and clear it, that floods our bodies with so much energy to now reproportion and go out and create the life that we love. So in the eight week course, I teach you how to do that and it's I suggest anybody who wants to get into some massive transformation check out my website and listen to my the mind blowing testimonies I have for my clients, because I still every week I'm like, wow, you did that.

Lunden Souza: 50:06

You did that. What's your website? I'll put it in the description, of course, but say it out loud for those that are like going to grab their phone and type it in right now.

Veronica Kelly: 50:16

heal yourself with veronica kelly. net

Lunden Souza: 50:19

heal yourself with veronica kelly. net I love it and I'm just going to put this out there because I know that I'm going to see you in person in Austin at the end of June. I would love to have a deeper conversation about your work in Christ consciousness as well as working in the quantum. I know that people listening are probably like wait, what does that mean? And that sounds interesting, or maybe they've heard it, but they don't fully grasp it. So I'm excited to continue the conversation, with your permission, if that's something we can do in person when I see you.

Veronica Kelly: 50:48

I would love that. You're amazing. I love yapping with your sis, so we can do a recorded and help people along the way. It inspires me and I'm honored and blessed to be able to share this space with you. So yes, please.

Lunden Souza: 51:07

All the things, and then for social media. So you said healyourselfwithveronicakelly. net is your website. And then what about like Instagram, or how can people connect with you on social media?

Veronica Kelly: 51:11

Absolutely so. My Instagram is my full name, Veronica Asia Kelly, so Veronica A-J-A. Kelly, and then you can find me on Facebook with Miss Veronica Kelly and um, and all of my links are on my Instagram as well, so you can bop around from different site to different site. And then we also I also have a course that's coming out with the launch of our NABA company, which I'm so excited to share with people. I've actually had a few of my clients get it early, pre-launch, and are absolutely loving it. So there's so many different ways to work with me.

Veronica Kelly: 51:45

I just feel so grateful to be able to share with the world all these tools.

Lunden Souza: 51:51

Perfect, and everything that Veronica mentioned I'll put in the show notes or the description on the YouTube channel, wherever you're listening to this episode. Veronica, thank you so much for your time, for your heart and for your willingness to share it here on the podcast. We appreciate you so much. I can't wait to hug you in person again and thank you, guys, for listening.

Veronica Kelly: 52:11

Thank you so much for having me, beauty. I appreciate you. Keep doing what you're doing in the world.

Lunden Souza: 52:16

Thank you so much for listening to this episode of Self Love and Sweat the podcast. Hey, do me a favor wherever you're listening to this podcast, give us a review this really helps a lot and share this with a friend. I'm only one person and with your help, we can really spread the message of self love and sweat and change more lives all around the world. I'm Lunden Souza, reminding you that you deserve a life full of passion, presence and purpose, fueled by self-love and sweat. This podcast is a Hitspot Austria production.